Chapter 3 - The Broken Ledger


I dialed the number Marcus had texted from immediately. It rang twice before clicking over to a dead line—a burner application or an untraceable VoIP service.
"He's killing her," I said, my voice dropping to a terrifyingly calm register. "A cabin. An unlicensed midwife. She has severe preeclampsia, Rachel. If her pressure spikes during labor, she will have a seizure. The placenta could abrupt. Both of them could bleed to death before an ambulance could reach an unpaved road in this weather."
Rachel grabbed my arm. Her fingers were surprisingly strong. "David, Marcus isn't a murderer. I know of him through the city charity circuit. He’s meticulous, and he cares about Emma. If Emma went with him, it’s because she believed she was in more danger staying here with you than running into a blizzard."
"I have never raised a hand to my wife!"
"Emotional danger, David!" Rachel cried out, tears finally spilling down her cheeks. "Look at yourself! You didn't even notice she was sick! When you came to my house last night, you spent four hours talking about your portfolio, your bridge loans, your reputation in the city! You checked your watch twenty times, not because you wanted to get home to Emma, but because the markets were closed and you couldn't control the bleeding! When was the last time you asked Emma how she felt without immediately pivoting to your own misery?"
I stared at Rachel, paralyzed.
The memory of last night washed over me, stripped of the noble narrative I had constructed in my mind.
Emma had been standing by the tree at eleven-thirty. She had been pale, her ankles visibly swollen over the edges of her slippers. She had offered to make me tea, but when she lifted the kettle, her hands had trembled so violently that water sloshed onto the counter. I hadn't taken the kettle from her. I had picked up my coat, complained about the icy roads, and told her that Rachel was having a nervous breakdown over her father's hospice care.
And Emma had smiled that small, devastating smile.
*“Go spend Christmas with her. Sometimes people need someone beside them when everyone else has gone.”*
She hadn't been giving me permission to comfort Rachel. She had been offering me a mirror, and I had been too blind to look into it. She had watched me abandon her for another woman's grief because my own house was too heavy for me to bear.
"Where is Marcus's cabin?" Rachel asked, cutting through my spiraling thoughts.
"I don't know," I whispered. "I didn't even know he had one."
"The foundation," Rachel said immediately. "The St. Jude Children’s Outreach Center owns retreat properties in the northern hills for underprivileged youth camps during the summer. My church partners with them sometimes. There’s a main lodge in Pine Creek, but there are smaller caretaker outposts scattered along the ridge."
"Pine Creek is forty miles north," I said, already reaching for my coat. "Through the mountain pass. The state police closed Highway 9 at dawn because of the snowdrifts."
"Then take my SUV," Rachel said, pulling her car keys from her pocket. "It has four-wheel drive and chains in the trunk. But David... you cannot go up there like a battering ram. If you storm in there screaming about your rights as a husband, you will drive her blood pressure straight through the roof. You will kill her yourself."
I took the keys from Rachel’s palm. They felt cold and heavy.
"Why are you helping me?" I asked, looking into the face of the woman I had once loved, whose presence in my life had just dismantled my marriage.
"Because I watched my husband die three months ago," Rachel said, her voice cracking with profound, unvarnished grief. "I watched the monitors flatline. I know what it feels like to hold a hand that will never squeeze back. You still have a chance to save your family, David. Don't let your pride make you a widower."
May you like
I didn't answer. I grabbed Emma’s hospital records from the nursery, stuffed them into my coat pocket, and ran out into the blinding white cold.
***